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    Jun 5, 2017

    How To Cope With A Jealous Boyfriend (Part 2)

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    In the last edition we dealt with how to cope with a jealous boyfriend. Read here. In that edition we established that a jealous boyfriend is dangerous to the health of a relationship, however we explained steps you can take to maintain that relationship if you absolutely want to keep the relationship moving. Here is the concluding part. Enjoy.

    1.   Make him know your friends and have their contact

    A jealous partner constantly responds to things he does not know or things he can’t see, things he don’t understand or things he plainly suspects to be working against him, the woman he loves and or his relationship. He is infuriated because of what he feels. When you go on an outing with someone he has not met, he gets angry and bitter. He reacts and at some point, when he meets you with any of these friends, he throws a shade at you, or the other guy, or unnecessarily gets angry at you, dragging you in the presence of a stranger (the other guy).
     One of the fruits of jealousy is uncontrolled anger in the presence of the person he suspects you to be cheating on him with. If you notice any of this in your relationship ensure that you are open to him about all your friends. Come out clean with him. If you have a hundred friends, let him know them all. If possible, let him meet them all, both male and female, even dogs, cats and chicken. Introduce them all to your beloved boyfriend. Let him know them and let him meet them. A jealous boyfriend has a sharp memory. If you tell him about your friends he will remember them all and can tell who is who, especially when you tell him you are with them and probably put them on the phone with him.

    2.   Be frank with your male friends:

    Be frank with him about who your male friends are. They are the real threats. If you want this relationship to survive then you got to open up with him about the men in your life; from your brother to your father to the other men without any biological relationship with you. Don’t hide from him anything as regards the opposite sex. If you just met someone tell your boyfriend about him. Don’t wait any moment longer so you don’t forget. The thing about the critical jealous boyfriend is that he trusts no one, including himself. He assumes when you say the truth it’s a conspiracy, he feels any guy he does not know is a threat to his relationship; he feels he is a partner you have always had way before and someone you love and are cheating on him with, when in actual fact you just met him some moments ago. Save yourself from this. Tell him about every and any male figure in your life. Be open, be frank, be realistic, be fare and be truthful. You can only save your relationship with a jealous boyfriend if you are truthful.

    3.   Avoid scandals

    Avoiding scandals is the one important way to get your relationship running smoothly. Don’t get into trouble, don’t keep a secret date or have a sexual relationship with any guy outside your partner. Be frank and be open and be plane; because we are living in a world where men can be very deceitful. The truth of the matter is that you might not want to have sex with that random dude, but because you were not careful, or because he was very smart and deceitful with you he made love to you, had it all on tape and afterwards uploaded the video to the internet or sent it as email to your partner. If you want your relationship with your partner to be itch free, then you must avoid scandals.
    If your relationship is hit by a scandal, what happens is that it diminishes your trust level with your partner. If something like that really happened and there is evidence to prove the obvious, that relationship might not survive, and if it does, this singular action might create a very deeply seated habit of suspicion and lack of trust for the remainder of the relationship or his life.

    4.   Send him surprise gifts

    The one very easy way to living with a jealous boyfriend is to create the impression that you are the one addicted to him, that it is you that is jealous of him or needs him badly and that if he is not on the same page with you, you might not survive the next storm. Apart from toasting him or sending him pictures and videos and texts and calling him regularly, surprise him with gifts. Now I’m not asking you to break the bank with them gold and diamond iPhones. However, surprise him with substance, gifts, flowers, cup cakes and whatever you know he loves and will never recover from, maybe a ticket to the game. SURPRISE HIM. If he is a foodie, then you have to know his favourite food. Know when he will be home and surprise him to a wonderful delicious treat; make his favourite, get him some clothes, some boxers or footwear. Make him happy by surprising him with gifts. This gives the impression that you love him and are addicted to him, that you don’t have time to toast another man since you are already using up all your time to surprising him.

    5.   Be close to an important figure in his life, someone he respects

    Every man has an important figure in his life. Know who his is. Know the figure, his mother or father or brother or pastor or long time friend. Know who this person is and get super close to this person. The truth is that he will most often than yes listen to the advice or the counsel of this person. If you want to win his heart and constantly keep him on your side, and constantly keep him staying true to you and constantly eliminate the thoughts of jealousy that might be plaguing your relationship, then you must keep this figure super close to you. Be close to this person in question, reveal secrets that threaten your relationship so that while you are working on keeping your man and relationship, the other person can also be working on building the trust that your man should have for you.

    6.   Make him happy

    Know what makes your man happy. If its food, or soccer or the football game. Know what makes him happy and flood him with excess of it. Lol. To be frank and for the records, excess happiness does not make a man sick, neither does it kill him. Flood him with happiness and gladness. Make him know that your life is about him and that if he does not love you or stay with you, you will die. Lol, not like you will actually die. But the strategy here is to toast him and declare unwavering loyalty to him while you make him happy. This soothes him, calms him and blinds him from whatever danger that might be brewing. This makes him doubt whatever anyone is saying. He assumes, if you can give him this level of love, dedication and gifts then you can’t cheat on him, if you can make him this happy, gifting to him what he loves then you can’t cheat on him. See the point?

    7.   Discern your threats and let him know them:

    As an actively beautiful lady, do not be deceived, you will be wanted and or hunted by other men. When you realize you are beginning to get too close to some other man, let him know. Talk to him about it, let him see the man coming too close to you or asking you out or getting too touchy. Let him know. Don’t wait until you have fallen in love with him or had sex with him, let your partner see the signs and let him know the man. If you can be open to a jealous boyfriend about a clear and present danger, he will forever be grateful to you.

    8.   Talk to him about coming along with you for meetings everywhere:

    If you are in a relationship with a jealous boyfriend, one of the things that happens in his life is that he always wants you to be with him, so that he can stalk you and see what you are doing at all times; so that he knows the guys running after you or calling you on phone or chatting you on WhatsApp, so that he can understand the threat and know how to deal with it. To play his game against him, you invite him to be with you. When you are planning your days, keep your schedule open. Plan them with him and try to invite him along. If he can’t come, due to the type of outing you are about to have, probably at the office doe an executive meeting or at a cafe or eatery to meet a client, honestly let him know, if possible, you create an alternative for him.; that since he can’t be in the meeting, he could walk you a distance, or come a half way or even be at the cafe or restaurant for the meeting, but be some distance away from where the actual deliberation happens. When you do this, you tell him or give him the impression that you can’t cheat on him.

    9.   Know when to move on

    After trying every of my advice and none seems to be working, know when to move on. Don’t risk your life in the arms of an abusive relationship. Don’t mortgage your future or liberty because you feel love for an over jealous boyfriend. If you can’t cope with him, move on. You deserve better.

    By: Jordan Brown Jnr

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